Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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