wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
