i permit you to call me
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
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