I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
