Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
