Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Even my vagina gasped.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Randomize
