that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Randomize
