Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
