I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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