maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
so much tequila, so little girl.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
