So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
