then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Randomize
