You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
