you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
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