theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
