Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
