If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Randomize
