Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
So. Much. Porn.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
