i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Randomize
