This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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