fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
