I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Randomize
