Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
