i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
