if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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