This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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