That's intense
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Randomize
