I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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