Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
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