windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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