There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
