Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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