im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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