i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Randomize
