Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
