He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
