So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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