is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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