Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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