Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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