Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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