Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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