You're so nebulous sometimes
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
