It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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