I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
