Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Randomize
