I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I have feelings that need drinking.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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