Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
