Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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