Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
